Critiquing Film, Television, and More

Twin Peaks (1990-1991): The TV Mini-Series That Reshaped the Murder Mystery Genre Forever

After almost three long years, I have finally finished watching Twin Peaks. Sorry, I just like to savor my treats for as long as possible, darlings.

In a parallel universe lies a distinct copy of Riverdale that is so godly, so dreamy, so A-1 classy, so unworldly unalike, and actually, well, a good show, that those in our current universe/dimension would never, ever reckon it to be real.

This entity is called Twin Peaks: a television show about excessively dramatic teenagers dealing with the death of a beloved, teenaged girl, the trauma of an unhinged family, the tensions between apprehensive, romantic relationships, the business of a hotel so curiously sketched with history that it’ll have you in utter contemplation of the thought, “man, can I get a room there?”, and the comradery of a police/FBI duo-team so likable and so pleasant that it will abruptly make for one of the best cinematic series of all freakin’ time. Lynch will force-fry a philosophy textbook right before your eyes yet, you won’t even blink for a second despite its ostentatious nature. It can be inferred that you will rather be enlightened by these peculiarities.

Top Twin Peaks Characters:

1. Dale Cooper 

2. Audrey Horne

3. Andy Brennan (AKA, God) 

4. Leland Palmer 

5. Sheriff Harry Truman

6. Lucy Moran

7. Director Gordon Cole (David Lynch!) 

8. The Giant

I only really need four things in my life: movies, unlimited access to 70s classic rock hits, a hard copy of The Catcher in the Rye, and any streaming service that features Breaking Bad and the first two seasons of Twin Peaks. A lover would be a secondary necessity, I suppose.

Twin Peaks Math: 

Season 1 Episode 1 = A+ 

Season 1 Episodes 2 = A- 

Season 1 Episode 3 = A 

Season 1 Episodes 4-7 = A- 

Season 1 Episode 8 = A

Season 2 Episode 1 = A

Season 2 Episodes 2-6 = A-

Season 2 Episodes 7-9 = A+

Season 2 Episode 10 = A-

Season 2 Episodes 11-17 = C+

Season 2 Episodes 18-20 = A-

Season 2 Episodes 21-22 = A+

Mean Verdict: A-

Audrey, Donna, and Shelly are the most beautiful women of all-time (put an emphasis on Audrey though). But, I shall not leave out the men in this equation; Detective Dale Cooper is also the ultimate SNACK.

“I can’t stop snapping my fingers because of this damn show.” – Everybody

“Twin Peaks” is now available to stream on Netflix, Amazon Prime, Hulu, and CBS. 

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