Warning: Minor Spoilers Ahead?
The Wicker Man should also be referred to as “Zoom-in-and-zoom-out, look at this Scottish art porn plus this dancing, and burn ’em, and burn ’em, and BURN ’EM ALIVE: The Musical.” What a cute movie!
Okay, this may sound eldritch, but apparently, I’m not Christian…or religious…or Atheist…or just plain human enough to find the cult in this movie that “maniac.” The whole time I was just like, “Yep…that may look weird to us, but we should just let them do what they want. Why ruin their happiness?”
Like, don’t tell me you felt thattt bad for the IGNORANT-ASS police officer in The Wicker Man. Dummy kind of had it coming, just sayin’…
And, so what? One sketchy sacrifice for the price of obtaining a prosperous town that at least thinks they’ll live resourcefully fulfilled lives, that gets along with one another all quite productively due to a bonding-based religion, and features no poverty whatsoever? You cannot tell me that doesn’t sound like a fair bargain in some sense! DOES YOUR TOWN HAVE THAT? HUH?
Verdict: B-
“The Wicker Man” is available to rent and buy on YouTube, iTunes, Vudu, Google Play, and The Criterion Channel.
Burning the Celluloid 
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