Quickie: The Texas Chain Saw Massacre (1974)

I can’t deny it; that may have been the best Keeping Up with the Kardashians episode yet.

Coming firmly and shamefully from an obsessive horror fan, I admit it; I have undoubtedly been putting off Tobe Hooper’s The Texas Chain Saw Massacre for way, way too long. I regret everything. 

Hooper’s freak show’s cheaply shot milieu is more inviting than it is bloodless. The aesthetically docudrama, homemade captions only lends its realism to a closer sincerity. The slasher flick is additionally decorated with some of the most disturbing and inventive props ever to be displayed in a horror motion picture.

Leatherface is easily in the top 5 greatest horror villains for me not only because his appearance/façade is emblematically unnerving, but his minimal yet present backstory is enough to petrify viewers. This is a low-budget passion project utilized to irrationally fortunate heights.

Halloween has a lot of things to thank The Texas Chain Saw Massacre for, but I think I prefer Carpenter’s slasher flick more simply because of its concentrated directing and infinitely effective score. But if you’re the kind of fella who likes a more raw, gory, and unequivocally convulsing killer feature, well, then don’t hesitate to watch Hooper’s classic. This movie truly is one hell of a mad tea party.

Verdict: A-

This Movie is a Part of My List: The 28 Best Horror Movies Ever

Side-note, but are those Marilyn Burn’s real green eyes? How can green eyes possibly be so…green? That’s…just…astonishing! 

“The Texas Chainsaw Massacre” is now available to rent and buy on YouTube, Amazon Prime, Google Play, Vudu, and iTunes.

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