OMG DWIGHT SCHRUTE IS IN THIS MOVIE WHAWHAWHAWHAWHAWHAT?
The first part of Rob Zombie’s Firefly Family trilogy, House of 1000 Corpses, is an aesthetic love letter to 50s freakshow creature-features and 70s grindhouse slasher-pictures, and while Zombie’s obscene, white-trash writing is definitely its own thing, it’s, unfortunately, an attribute I wouldn’t consider as a positive.
The editing is hind of reliant on being hyperactively hasty, but that kind of goes hand in hand with its aspiration to make itself feel like an overcharged love letter. The acting is very on-and-off; sometimes it works with the mad-capped tone and sometimes it’s just insufferable. The formidable characters, costumes, and set pieces are so gratifying nonetheless!
In any case, I feel like Zombie purposely made this movie half artistically ambitious and half unbearably obnoxious just to toy with us. I guess that’s “horror” in some respects.
Verdict: C+
“The House of 1000 Corpses” is now available to rent and buy on Amazon Prime, YouTube, Vudu, iTunes, and Google Play.
Burning the Celluloid 
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