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Eleven New Things I Have to Say About Rian Johnson’s Knives Out

Click Here to Read My OG Review!

Got cut from my Jungle Cruise early screening because I wasn’t cool enough for the club, but that’s alright. For my troubles, I got free passes to go see Knives Out again, and honestly, I’d happily take that over watching the Rock swing through a jungle for the third time.

  • Knives Out deserves an Oscar nomination for best screenplay, but we all know that it’s not going to get it. It’s a real pity. 
  • Why is Knives Out low-key the Americanized version of Parasite?
  • After this carefully examined rewatch, I can confirm that there are, indeed, no loose ends in Knives Out (unlike Johnson’s previous film which has more loose ends than our knowledge of what comes after death). Bravo. 
  • This movie has convinced me that two climaxes per movie is not such a bad idea after all.
  • Some clothing company needs to make t-shirts with the slogan “CSI KFC” on them. Now, I’d buy that for a pretty penny. Credit me later. 
  • Coming from somebody who personally doesn’t fancy all the SJW agendas we have in the media today, people saying that the social commentary in Knives Out is “left-wing propaganda” I’d have to say are overreacting. It’s fine the way it is—and quite insightful and fair, to be frank. 
  • The part where Rian Johnson just decides to grab the camera off of its tripod mid-way through shooting a particular shot to give us an “in your face” feeling was so hilarious. 
  • Let’s be real, only Chris Evans can make sweaters look sexy ASF. 
  • That final shot really hits, huh? 
  • I suspect “foul play” in all of the 1/10 star reviews of Knives Out on IMDb. Get away Star Wars fanboys! Shoo! 
  • Knives Out should be considered a Thanksgiving classic in the future. Change my mind.

Verdict: B+

2019 Ranked

“Knives Out” is now playing in theaters.

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